Hotpenning part 3

Maria gazed at Blue Teddy in dismay, how was she going to break this to Lizzy. Blue Teddy sheepishly looked up to her; "I'm sorry auntie Maria, but I can't hide it anymore. I am a girl teddy, and I want to be pink!" Auntie Maria, took Blue Teddy in her arms. He was quite a sight. She had wondered why he had been so quiet this last half hour, and now she knew. His once soft baby blue fur, was thickly lathered in the barbie pink paint Lizzy had bought for the girl teddies playroom. Around his round little belly, was the orange tutu, Lizzy had worn for Halloween, and fashioned on his little paws, were pink ballerina slippers, his new name stubbornly written on the sole. OK, Pink Bear, I'm sure mummy Lizzy won't mind, but lets see if we can make you a nicer tutu. 

Maria picked up the small stone bear, it felt quite cold in her hand although there was something rather strange about it. Suddenly it's serene little mouth cracked open and uttered four words, "Wisdom comes from living". "Oh!" exclaimed Maria, quite taken aback by the talking stone bear. "Are you a Buddha Bear?". "I conform to no religion, but follow only the Bearnecessities of Life, That is to sleep, eat and hug. If you too follow this wise path, your life will be one of bliss".  Well Maria was quite chuffed, sleeping and eating already took up the majority of her days, and she was certainly a hugger, perhaps in time Maria could become a Blissful bear?

NO! Mr Wicken, shouted Mrs Wicken - you simply can't wear THAT to the garden party. "But all the other roosters are wearing it, I think I look cool, you know - down with the chicks?" Mrs Wicken rolled her eyes, trust her to marry the nutty one. He was only 4 and obviously having a major mid life crisis. "Darling Chickypoo" she said soothingly, desperately trying to disguise her grating annoyance. "The other roosters are not wearing pigeon feather waistcoats, only Bob is, and you know he's slightly loopy, cavorting with Mrs Woody, who you know is married by the way! Honestly this was meant to be a nice neighbourhood! Plus, you know as well as I do, that neither of us will be, how do you put it? "Down with the chicks!" They are young, we are not so young, it's their prerogative to think us ancient and uncool".

"But don't you think I look like Rocky Rooster? Maybe if I gelled my comb, you know made it look a bit like Elvis?"

"Elvis!!" Screamed Mrs Wicken. "It's been 40 years since Elvis was cool, the young chicks aren't fashioning themselves on him, they like Elbow and The Doves and such like". Mrs Wickens was at the end of her feather, everyday this week, Mr Wickens had been acting like a crazy middle aged delinquent. Just yesterday he had spent all day in the coop, only to burst out , sat in food trough he had 'transformed' into an Aston Martin!

Mr Wicken looked crest fallen. "Those stupid doves, they get all the attention, just cause their so white and perfect. I don't even have an elbow, how come chicks like elbows?

Mr Wicken was evidently way behind on the times. "You know", said Mrs Wicken with a wink, "I like Elvis, and you already have a wonderful white suit of feathers. Why don't you gel your comb, fluff your chest and pop on your blue suede shoes?"

Mr Wicken, smiled. He could strut his stuff like the best of them. 

And Mrs Wicken? Well, at least he wasn't wearing pigeon feathers. Looking at his now, his ego restored. She remembered why she'd married him.

Piddle! said Maria - I'll never teach this dog to do what I say. Mark had predicted that Maria would be useless at training their 4 month old springer spaniel puppy, aptly named Springstein. For a starter, she had chosen him because he was 'cutely mischivious'. In other words naughty! It was going to be an up hill struggle. As Maria's favourite pot, smashed to the floor it suddenly struck her. I will use reverse psychology! 

"Springstein stay on the sofa. Springstein eat mummies favourite shoe. Springstein steal the Sunday roast, make yourself ill and be sick on daddies side of the bed. Good boy, Springstein." Mark wandered in, with a look of complete bewilderment. "Did you just praise him for being sick on my side of the bed?"

"Yep, I'm trying reverse psychology"

"WHAT! He's a dog!, He doesn't understand that!"

"Are you sure? He seems to be doing a little less naughty stuff"

"Right that's it Springstein, you and your mum are going to doggy training school!"

Maria and Springstein shared a look, they were allies now. Them again the evil doggy maria trainer.